Talk at cross purposes
by LovelessDestiny
Summary: Clint/Phil, slash. Clint and Phil a married but Phil wants to keep it a secret. Clint agrees but a new Agent turnes his world upside down. She's Phil's ex-girlfriend and her presence wakes old romantic memories, or not? Nonetheless Clint has to deal with her and his troubled marriage.
1. Trouble in paradies

I don't own the Avengers, movies and comics. They belong to Marvel and I'm sadly not part of it.

I'm not sure where the idea came from but I had to get it out of the way or else I'll never finish my other fics.

I hope you enjoy it, at least just a little.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Clint left Fury's office, he took a deep breath. The older man knew about his and Coulson's relationship but asking him for a favor was something else. Fury was kind enough to hear him out before he burst into laughter. Clint was shocked to see the stoic man laugh, it was still kind of cold and reserved but it was a laugh nonetheless. Fury called him incorrigible and romanticist, though he wasn't sure if he meant him or Coulson. Most probably he meant both. What bothered Clint most was the sarcasm dripping from these words but Clint came to the conclusion that, for normal people, his request wasn't meaningful at all.

Barton asked Fury for a new service weapon for Phil, with a silver ring around the handle and gravures on it. He wanted their initials and date of marriage embedded in the silver, with enough decoration around it to not catch everyone's eye instantly. They couldn't wear their wedding bands at work and it was almost impossible to wear them outside of work, in case they had to head out as soon as possible. The ring could give their marriage away, even though fraternization wasn't an issue Phil wanted to keep it quiet. Natasha had called him Jeannie once but after he put some itching powder in her panties, they were stationed in a military base in the middle of nowhere; she decided to harass him otherwise. Her argument for calling him Jeannie was that he was a hidden secret and every time she came over and her visit wasn't expected, Hawkeye vanished into thin air until Coulson gave him an okay. Once she entered Coulson's office together with Steve rather quickly and she saw how the bars of the ventilator shaft closed quietly. He told her that it was okay with him, he was used of hiding but she gave him a strange look in return. He's still sure there was a hint of pity in her gaze.

Coulson was important for SHIELD and he couldn't risk losing the respect of his men. Authority, respect and trust were important to lead a unit into the field.

Clint entered Phil's office, not bothering to knock, "Hey, sir."

Phil didn't look up from the pile of files, "What can I do for you, Agent Barton?"

Clint smirked, "I'm a little bored and I though you could help me out."

"I'm busy," his fingers danced over the keyboard, tipping a report.

"You look like you could use a break," Clint leaned against Phil's desk.

"I don't need rest Agent, but I need silence," he continued to tip his report. Clint sighed and left the office. He returned ten minutes later with a big cup of coffee and sandwiches. He placed them on Phil's desk. "At least eat," he turned around to leave; Phil wasn't in the mood for his games that day.

He could hear a soft 'thank you' before he closed the door on his way out.

Something was bothering his husband but he couldn't figure out what it was, they normally had no secrets.

"Maybe he isn't allowed to speak about it?" Natasha offered during lunch, she sensed his thoughts.

"Is it that obvious," it wasn't a real question.

"I know you guys for years. There's nothing you can hide," she grinned.

"He keeps his distance and I don't know why," Hawkeye put his sandwich down.

"Be patient," her gaze wandered to the other end of the room. Two junior agents were talking about anal retentive and heartless superiors. Their main theme was a mission two days ago. Hill and Coulson had shared an operation to annihilate a lab. They searched for the ultimate virus for a biowarfare but SHIELD was fast enough to spare humanity the pain. Six junior and one of the senior agents lost their lives in the wake of an explosion. Tony had bruised ribs and Clint was hit by a piece of shrapnel on the arm but it was barely more than a long scratch.

"These idiots got two of my buddies killed," one of the junior agents hissed. Clint raised a brow while he pulled one of his knifes out of their hiding place, Natasha gave him a little grin.

"Especially Agent C….," the young agent stopped suddenly, a beautifully crafted knife missed his nose barely by one millimeter and buried itself in the wall.

Clint rose from his chair and strolled over to the younger agents. "It's not clever to insult superiors in public places like the cafeteria. Who knows who is listening," he pulled his knife out of the wall and cleaned it from dust on his pants. Phil bought him the set of knifes a few months ago; they looked like a mix of military and lord of the rings. Tony asked him if he tried to be an elf but Clint simply said, 'I'm awesome so my weapons have to be awesome too and these knifes are pretty awesome', the corner of Phil's mouth had twitched at that but that was the only indication that he cared about their banter.

"Keep your opinion to yourself," he warned and put his knife away. Clint walked back to Natasha.

"He aimed at my face," the junior agent shrieked after he realized what exactly happened moments ago.

One of his companions scratched his forehead and replied, "He didn't aim at your face."

"How do you know?" the young agent grew angry.

"Because Hawkeye never misses," another agent answered his question. The young man paled visibly.

"It's always funny when you scare off the fledglings," Natasha waved at the young men at the other table as they took their guts together to look at Hawkeye and her. They paled even more, if that's even possible.

"Phil doesn't like it at all, at least that's what he says but I'm pretty sure he laughs his ass of inwardly," Clint grinned.

"He loves your pranks he always did," she confirmed and the sadness vanished from his eyes. "So what do you get him for your anniversary?" she leant forward and whispered.

"I requested a new gun for him and I want to get a new tattoo," he whispered back, "but I'm not sure about the motive."

"Hmm," she considered for a moment. "Let's meet after work and figure it out," she offered. He loved her for that; she was like the sister he never had. She was family, just like Phil.

"You just want to see it first," he mocked.

"Of course I do," she huffed before she got up. "Now, let's cause some mischief until we clock out," he grinned and followed her.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::

They visited the best tattooist in town and talked for a long time before he drew the perfect tattoo for their anniversary. He didn't get permission to wear his ring but not even Phil could prohibit a new tattoo.

"He'll love it," Natasha said convinced and the tattooist nodded in agreement, it was one of his best works.

"You think?" he looked up, hope in his eyes. Natasha was always surprised how low his self esteem could be for someone who was known for his impudent and cocky behavior.

"I'm sure," she reassured, examining the tattoo. Above his heart was an infinity sign, through the first circle of the sign flew a falcon and the second circle belonged to a strong and proud black panther, looking towards his hawk.

The tattoo was rather big with a 3D effect. "It's awesome," Hawkeye's self-esteem was back to normal thanks to Natasha's confirmation.

"An endless circle of love," the tattooist sighed. "I wish I had that too."

"Be patient," she patted his back, "they danced around each other for years," she pointed at Clint.

"Hey." Clint huffed, "we only needed a little longer to bond than others."

"He hated your guts," she raised a brow.

"No he didn't," his voice softened and he believed in what he said, she could see it.

"No he didn't," she repeated with a little smile.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::

The day of their anniversary had come and Fury had used a quiet moment to slip him the new gun. Clint nodded a thank you and hurried to the locker room to hide the gun until he finished work. He used the ventilation shafts to make sure no one interfered with his surprise.

Just before Phil finished his last report for the day, he got a call and the order to support a fellow agent and his team. He hurried out of the office, not giving Clint a message.

Clint could go up the wall; he was waiting for his husband for four hours. He tried to call him but didn't get an answer.

As the clock stroke midnight his initial inner turmoil was only describable as sheer panic.

_~ Shall I search him? What if he comes home in the meanwhile? What if he's hurt? What if he's dead? Face down in the dirt in a back alley… What if he got kidnapped? What if… ~_

The door interrupted his thoughts, his head shot up to get a look at his husband.

He got up from his place on the couch and pulled Phil into a tight embrace.

"Where have you been?" Clint tried to banish the panic from his voice.

"Johnson needed help, he managed to blow a simple operation and I had to clean up his mess," Phil inhaled the soothing scent of his young husband.

"Next time just leave a note," Clint chided. "I was worried."

"I was in a hurry," he simply stated, Clint sighed. "I know but you have to tell me something like that."

"I know." Phil ended the hug and got rid of his shoes and jacket.

"Do you want something to eat?" Clint offered, he could be a real good husband when he wanted to be.

"I only want to go to bed," he gave Clint a brief kiss and went to the bedroom. He never noticed the set table, the candles and his favorite music.

Clint cleared the table and turned off the radio before he joined Phil. The older man was already asleep. He smiled sadly at his lover before he took of his clothes and slipped into bed.

Clint realized that Phil faced the wrong side of the room, normally he was spooning behind Clint but this time he faced the bathroom door instead, laying with the back to him.

Clint snuggled closer to Phil and put an arm around his waist, for the first time in years he was the one spooning behind Phil. He didn't like it. He didn't feel as safe as he should in their bed.

Phil always had the talent to give him a feeling of safety. May it be, at home or a top secret mission. Phil was always near and his presence calmed most of his fears. He still hadn't figured out why Phil loved him but he believed him when he said 'I love you'.

He watched Phil for a while before he closed his eyes to get a little sleep.

:::::::::::::::::::

Clint was up before the sun rose; he took Phil's weapon out of the holster and replaced it with the new one. He placed a gentle kiss on Phil's forehead before he sneaked out of the bedroom.

He prepared breakfast and left a little note next to the plate before he left.

Clint went straight to the firing range.

Phil rubbed his eyes and looked at the clock next to the bed 10 a.m., he jumped out of bed to find his clothes until he remembered that it was Saturday.

He groaned and grabbed his sweatpants. "Clint?" he called, "Love, where are you?" he strolled into the kitchen, seeing the food and the note 'I'm back at about 2 p.m., Love Clint'.

The food was cold but the timer for the coffeemaker was set for 10 a. it was fresh and hot, Phil smiled lovingly. "You know me too well," he spoke to himself.

He opened the refrigerator and frowned, there were various Tupperware's with leftovers. It looked delicious. He racked his brain for an answer to why Clint went through all the effort to cook.

Phil wanted to smash his head against the cupboard as the answer hit him full force. Yesterday was their third wedding anniversary. He ignored his breakfast and shuffled through the apartment, thinking about a way to apology.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Clint fired his last arrow as the door to the range opened. "You needed more time than I thought," he said before he collected his arrows.

"I'm sorry," Phil sounded honest and Clint knew he was.

"You were tired," he smiled up at Phil, "but don't you ever turn your back on me again," his smile wavered for a moment. Phil thought of what his lover could mean as he remembered the position he woke up that morning.

"I'd never turn my back on you deliberately," the older agent vowed.

"Good." Clint's smiled brightened, "I don't feel safe without your arms around me."

"Let's get out of here," Phil ordered with a little smirk, he knew his embrace kept nightmares away.

"Yes sir." Clint took his bow and followed his lover.

"Where are we going?" Clint noticed that they were heading in the wrong direction.

"Surprise," Phil stared at the street. Clint was indeed surprised because he hadn't planned on that. He thought they would go home, fall into bed together and forget that it ever happened.

But not this time, he felt like the time they were newlyweds.

They drove for an hour until they reached the woods. Phil led him down a narrow way until they reached a clearing.

"It's beautiful," Clint looked around. Trees, flowers, the blue sky all that gave the clearing a calming charm.

Phil opened his backpack. "Not as beautiful as you," he blushed slightly.

Clint turned around to look at him. "Love you too," he smirked. He loved it when Phil blushed.

Phil spread a blanket and opened the Tupperware, "You're a great cook," Phil praised.

"I almost ruined the sauce but yeah I'm damn awesome," he settled down next to Phil.

"I wouldn't say your awesome agent more something like gifted," Phil said deadly serious.

"Gifted huh?" Clint jumped his lover, he kissed him with passion.

"Yeah very talented," Phil panted after their mouths part. Clint smirked and opened Phil's shirt, sucking his way down to his lover's belt. With few smooth motions he got rid of the belt and pants including his underwear.

"If you keep up that pace I'm not going to last long," Phil moaned.

"You don't have to," Clint meant what he said. "It's about you. You work too much you need time to relax."

"Relax, sounds good," Phil grinned.

Clint took him into his mouth and sucked him off. He had a very talented tongue and he knew how Phil liked it most.

Phil tried to catch his breath. "I… was wrong," he admitted.

"Oh yeah? About what?" he knew the answer to his question.

"You're awesome," he pulled his younger lover up to kiss him.

"Let's eat. I'm sure you missed breakfast," Clint pushed a piece of bread into his lover's mouth.

"You're creepy," Phil said lovingly.

"I learned from the best." Clint caressed Phil's cheek, "and I won't tell anyone what a big softy you are at home."

"You better don't because I could tell them what a great housewife you are," he retorted.

Clint laughed, "Ah, shut up."

After they finished most of the food they laid down for a little nap. They weren't able to doze off because they weren't at home and it could be dangerous to let their guard down in the middle of nowhere. But they rested their eyes while they cuddled. Not as if they would ever admit to it.

Phil's hand traced up and down Clint's side. "What's that?" he sat up like a flash, "Did you get hurt during our last mission?"

Clint needed a moment to digest what Phil was saying, "No, I reported all injuries to you."

"So what's that?" he pointed at Clint's chest, Clint realized that Phil must have touched the foil that protected his still healing tattoo from harm.

"I…," Clint felt suddenly rather insecure.

"I-What?" he glared, but Clint could see worry in his eyes.

He opened his shirt and revealed the tattoo. He closed his eyes, too scared to see anger in his lover's eyes.

Phil let out a gasp. "It's beautiful," he studied the tattoo. Clint opened his eyes, sighing in relieve.

"Why, a black panther?" Phil asked curious.

"I think it suits you," Clint looked at his tattoo. "You're strong, proud, elegant, and you look damn hot in black."

"I love it," Phil took Clint's hand. "One more question. Why, a new tattoo?"

"I can't wear my wedding band," he said simply and Phil understood the whole meaning of the tattoo.

"One day you can," Phil promised but Clint new better. "No I can't but it's okay. As long as I have you everything is fine."

Phil pulled Clint against his chest, they watched the sunset in silence.


	2. Secret mission

Their Sunday bed acrobatic routine was disturbed by a call from Fury; some kind of robot was marching through downtown.

"Hawkeye, in position?" Coulson spoke in his earpiece.

"Yes sir, got a nice view." Hawkeye hid on the roof of a twelve story building.

"Target in sight?" Coulson planned their next move.

"Negative," Hawkeye sounded bored. "I'm a little bored up here. Can't you order him to come my way?"

"It would be too easy if I could order the enemy around, wouldn't it?" Coulson remained emotionless.

"You're Agent Coulson you can do anything," Phil could hear the smirk in his lover's voice.

"Keep the frequency clear," Coulson warned half heartily.

"But I like talking, sir," Hawkeye pushed his buttons.

"I know you do but sometimes you have to keep your mouth shut," Coulson replied.

"Yes sir," Hawkeye agreed with a heavy sigh.

"Target in sight," Clint broke radio silence.

"Bring him down," Coulson said simply.

"He reminds me of whiplash, only bigger," Tony said. "I hate maniacs."

"Aren't you one of them?" Clint mocked.

"Har-Har-Har," Tony hit the enemy full force with his repulsors. "Shouldn't you shoot a few arrows instead of mocking me?" the enemy absorbed the energy Tony shot.

"I can do both," Hawkeye provoked even more.

"Shut up Hawkeye," Coulson snapped. Hawkeye kept silent.

In the end it was Hulk who turned the dice. "Hulk smashed robot," he cheered. After Hawkeye had blown one part of the hydraulic system Hulk used his chance and broke the robots neck and disconnected the torso from the control center. A hatch opened and a burly man with short hair stepped out of it. He didn't seem clever enough to build something complicated like a war machine but they could be wrong.

"Hands up and kneel down," an agent ordered but the man pulled a gun, an arrow penetrated his heart before he got a chance to pull the trigger.

"We needed him alive," Coulson hissed angrily.

"He aimed at you sir," Hawkeye said without emotions.

"It's not the time for loyalty Agent," he turned off his earpiece.

"I'm in trouble," Clint left his position.

"You're a hotshot," Tony raged, "How are we supposed to know who sent him, huh?"

"You're hot tempered too," Clint countered. "You might be a genius but you tend to do stupid things too."

"At least I AM intelligent, have you ever seen a school from the inside?" Tony shot back, regretting the words instantly as he saw the pain in Clint's eyes.

"Believe it or not but yeah I saw a school once," Barton swallowed his feelings and his tone remained cheeky.

"Stop it," Steve interfered. "It wasn't a vise decision but Hawkeye had to react fast or otherwise Agent Coulson could have died."

"It was stupid nonetheless." Coulson crossed his arms in front of his chest and stared at Clint, "I want your full report on my desk within the next hour."

"But sir…"

"No buts Agent Barton. You made a wrong decision and you have to live with the consequence," Coulson's expression was stony.

"Oh yeah I love to kill," he got up. "Paperwork is a real mean way to punish me."

"Don't exaggerate. I can't even count how many men you killed," that was a low blow.

"Yeah as if you know exactly how many lives you took," Clint exited the room. The rest of the Avengers remained silent, lost in their own thoughts. How many people did SHIELD kill? And how did the fight get out of hand?

Natasha watched in silence and shook her head in annoyance.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

It was way past midnight as Phil came home. The apartment was dark the door to the living room was closed, Phil was surprised.

He went into his bedroom to change out of his clothes; he tried to be silent so he wouldn't wake Clint. He stripped down to his boxers and slipped into bed, he reached out and frowned. He was alone.

He got up and hurried to the living room, he opened the door carefully. "Clint?" Phil whispered.

"Don't wake him," Natasha appeared behind him. "He just fell asleep."

"What are you doing here?" Phil asked confused.

"I'm his friend," she stated, "we are family."

"I know," he sighed. "I fucked this up."

"You're both at fault," she thought about her conversation with Clint. "He's sorry and he promised to keep his emotions in check. He got scared as the man pointed his gun at you. He didn't think he just acted and after he realized what he had done he cursed himself but it was too late."

"I know that," he stroke through his hair. "We have to be careful or one of us will pay the price one day."

"There's no difference," she said. "You love one another, married or not, nothing will change the outcome once a mission fails. I will not stand by and watch you go down, I'll fight too and I'll do what's necessary."

"We are screwed," Phil chuckled sadly.

"Yes but you love us that way and we love you," she turned around and vanished in the darkness. Only the soft click of the front door indicated that she left the apartment. Phil sat down in front of the couch. "You don't have to sleep on the couch. You could have thrown me out of the bedroom."

"Your back aches whenever you fall asleep on the couch," Clint said sleepily.

"You're incorrigible," he sighed. "I want you to know that I'm sorry," he continued.

"I'm sorry too," Clint turned around to face Phil.

"I know why you did this. It's still not okay but I understand. Thank you for saving my life."

"You would have done the same," Clint was sure.

"I wouldn't because I'm not as hotheaded as you," he lied.

Clint snorted before he closed his eyes, he was tired. "Don't fall asleep again I don't carry you to the bedroom."

"'m sleep here," Clint mumbled, Phil snatched his blanket and pillow. "Hey."

"Bed now," he ordered. Clint waddled into the bedroom and fell into bed. Phil shook his head with a little grin on his face while he tucked his lover in.

"Why didn't you pull your gun? Was dangerous!" Clint mumbled while Phil got into bed.

"I knew you have my back," Coulson made a mistake in judgment but he knew Hawkeye would always be there.

"'m not a murderer," Barton clung to Phil's hand.

Phil pulled him closer. "I know you're not. You do what you have to do and I know you have a conscience. You'd never hurt innocents."

Clint fell asleep with a content sigh and Phil snuggled even closer, "Love you."

This time they slept in the right position. Hawkeye had his back during missions but at home he returned the favor.

:::::::::::::::::::::

"Agent Barton, in my office NOW!" Phil yelled after a little mission. Clint seemed confused but followed the order. Tony smirked behind him and Steve frowned deeply.

"Yes sir?" Clint leaned against the desk, smirking slightly.

"What have you done to my weapon?" Phil looked angry and Clint was wondering if he made a grave mistake.

"It's an anniversary gift, sir," his posture stiffened.

"What?" Phil deadpanned. "You can't run around and replace service weapons."

"I don't run around. I only replaced yours," Clint tried to lighten the mood with his tone but failed.

"Where is my weapon?" Phil came closer, for a moment Clint thought Phil might hit him so he took a step back. People tended to hit him for mistakes. Phil stopped in his tracks, trying to analyze the haunted look in his lover's eyes. He stepped back too after he realized that he'd scared his husband.

"I'm back in a few minutes." Clint fled, heading for the locker room.

Phil sighed, he was stressed and tired and the new temporary addition to the unit wasn't fun either. He didn't want to see that person ever again but he had no choice. But the more he thought about it the more he came to the conclusion that it wasn't that bad. She had left him fifteen years ago. He might have married her instead but she broke his heart and just a few years later Hawkeye entered his life and turned it for the better. Clint was the center of his life now and he smiled at the thought. He would get that job done and then everything would go back to normal. "He's still scared of my wrath," he mumbled to himself. Clint had to endure a lot during his childhood and even as an adult.

He was so lost in thoughts that he didn't notice Clint dangling from the ceiling behind him. He dropped off the weapon and vanished in the shaft again.

Phil sat down and noticed the gun on top of the pile of files. "Clint?" he called out, "Come out, please."

Clint lay in the shaft, watching Phil through the grids. His head rested on his arms while he looked down.

"Stop hiding, I know you're still here," Phil sighed and rubbed his face.

"Look, I'm sorry, okay?" Phil looked up at the ceiling. "I'm tired and stressed out, it wasn't my intention to scare you. I'll never hit you and you know that."

"I know but it's not a reason to lash out at me," came the soft whisper through the ceiling.

"You're right," Phil knew it wasn't fair, "but you can be absolutely nerve-wrecking."

"You knew that before you married me," Clint stated.

"Yeah," there was a loving undertone in his voice. "I knew and I proposed to you anyway."

"And I said yes even though I knew you're devoted to your job and rules," there was no regret in his tone. "Can I come down and write my report here with you?"

"You can have the couch," Phil smiled at the ceiling, "and Hawkeye! Thank you. I love it."

"I hoped you would," he landed in front of Phil's desk.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

"Fury, sir." Phil cornered the man after a meeting. "I'd like to register a new service weapon," he pulled out the new gun.

"The gun is registered, didn't he tell you?" Nick frowned slightly.

"Barton followed protocol?" now Phil was surprised.

"He asked me to order a new weapon for you, with little modifications," he winked.

"You knew?" Coulson tried to imagine Clint asking Fury for a new weapon.

"I was your best man, of course I know." Fury turned around to leave, "and apologize to your boy."

"What?" Phil frowned. "Don't think I don't know you. I'm sure you tore him a new one for replacing your weapon," Fury looked back.

Phil sighed, that was answer enough. "Focus on the new mission. Tomorrow morning 8 a.m. don't let her wrap you around the finger, she isn't the person you knew anymore," Nick reminded.

"Yes sir," Coulson nodded. He couldn't believe his Veronica had changed that much, but SHIELD had reasons to believe she might be a mole. He hoped she was not. Was all they had been a lie?


	3. Don't you love me anymore?

"Phil," a female voice chirped before she flung herself at him.

Clint gaped at them in astonishment.

"Seems our dear Coulson does have a private life," Tony joked.

"They seem to fit together," Steve agreed.

Bruce just raised a brow in surprise and Thor smiled broadly. "Let me introduce you to Agent Veronica Redcliff, I don't think I have to introduce the Avengers," he smiled.

"Nice to meet you, Mr. Rogers, Mr. Stark, Mr. Banner and SHIELD's most undisciplined Agent Barton," her smile widened at the last part. Clint wasn't sure if she made a joke or just insulted him. The rest of the team laughed so he decided to play along.

"So are you the future Mrs. Coulson," he mocked with a friendly smile.

"Who knows," she looked at Phil. "We split up fifteen years ago but fraternization isn't an issue anymore," she winked.

Clint felt his heart clench. "Why is she here?" he asked blunt.

"She just got promoted and she has to learn to lead a team in the field. Hill and I will make sure she's ready to face anything once she leaves for her own team," Phil replied.

"Yeah, modern times," Clint said melodramatic and got a glare from Phil.

"You have a pretty female friend," Thor cheered. "We should celebrate your get together."

"We are not an item," Coulson said but it seemed the Avengers made up their mind.

Natasha brushed against Clint's arm to offer some comfort. "Let's get out of here," she whispered, he nodded.

They headed for the gym, she knew him well enough to know what he needed at the moment and that was a brawl.

They spared for two hours until Clint got down from his rage. He was blue and green like always when he spared with Natasha. She was a creepy woman but he loved her nonetheless.

"Get up," she offered him a hand. He took it and winced, "Ow."

"Aw, don't whine. I've got a pretty shiner too," she smirked. "I'm hungry, you can join me."

"No, thank you," he straightened his clothes.

"Where are you going?" she had an idea.

"Firing range," he headed for the door.

"Don't overdo it," she warned, he just waved his hand in dismissal.

Phil sat on his couch and watched T.V.; he looked at his watch, "Where are you?"

11 p.m. and Clint wasn't home yet. Phil called Clint a few times and left messages on his voicemail. Clint didn't come home that night.

"Do you know where he is?" Phil asked Natasha.

"Last time I saw him he left for the firing range," she replied with worry in her eyes.

"He's jealous," Phil stated.

"Of course he is," she frowned. "What would you feel when your team decides to play matchmaker for Clint?"

His eyes narrowed. "Thought so," she said.

Phil headed for the firing range but it was empty so he went back to his office with a sigh.

He stopped in his tracks as he opened the door, Clint slept on the couch in the office. Phil locked his door.

"Clint," Phil shook him gently. Clint jerked awake; Phil knew he rarely slept when he was alone and when he did it was more than restless.

"Morning," Clint rubbed his eyes.

Phil didn't say anything, he just pulled his lover close. "You know that I love you right?"

Clint nodded. "Good," Phil kissed his temple. "Whatever happens don't forget that I love you, only you."

"Is it true?" Clint finally said.

"That we where together?" Clint nodded. "Yes. She left me fifteen years ago. Her career was more important than our relationship, she worked for us as a spy. She's one of the best."

"Do you still love her?" Clint dreaded the answer. "No I do not," Phil answered truthfully.

"Are you sure?" Clint didn't like what he saw in their eyes.

"I am sure," he hated it when Clint wasn't his shining self-confident self.

Clint kissed him briefly before he got up to unlock the door. "See you sir," he said as a junior agent passed the door.

"Barton," Phil called; Clint peeked into the room, "Yes sir?"

'Love you' Coulson mouthed and got a smile in return. "Ditto sir," Clint blew him a kiss.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::

"Hawkeye, found a nest?" Phil asked.

"Yes sir," was the reply.

"Captain America would you be so kind and tell Hulk not to destroy too many vehicles just for fun," Phil sighed, Clint chuckled.

"What's so funny Agent?" Phil's mood wasn't the best.

"Did you listen to yourself? That was funny," Clint shot an arrow, and hit the robot wasp in the eye.

"Good shot and no it is not funny when Hulk destroys the town," Phil shot at a robot wasp.

Steve cut them in half with his shield and Tony roasted them with his repulsor.

"How many are there?" Clint sighed, the swarm got bigger and bigger.

"Stop breaking radio silence Agent," Phil hissed, he barely got out of the way as a wasp shot a steel spike at him.

"Can't we misuse a gas line to roast these things and we get the fire under control with one of the water pipes, hydrants whatever…," Redcliff mused.

"That could work," Steve agreed. Phil pondered his options and came to the conclusion that it wouldn't be more expensive in the end.

"Yeah let's toast them," Tony sounded cheerful.

"Sir, I ….," Clint got interrupted.

"Radio silence Hawkeye," Redcliff reminded. "We're in the middle of planning a strategic advantage," her tone was strong and authoritative.

"Good, I think you got the hang on it," Phil praised.

They got into action and Hawkeye kept silent the whole time. He shot down stray wasps while Hulk and Captain America burned the others to ashes.

Tony extinguished the flames after the swarm lay on the ground in a pile of junk.

"Clear up and depart," was the short order.

"Good job Mrs. Redcliff," Steve smiled. "I think you'll be a great leader."

"Thank you," she blushed slightly, "but I did what I had to do."

"Don't sell yourself short," Phil liked working with her and after all this weeks he had more and more problems to believe she might be a spy for the other side.

"Hawkeye get your ass down here," Tony yelled. "Stop sulking 'cause it wasn't your great idea."

Clint had trouble to climb down the roof. One of the steel stings hat hit his shoulder, he got rid of it but he couldn't use his arm like he wanted to.

"Shut up," he muttered under his breath while he climbed slowly and carefully down. He had turned off his radio after Redcliff forbid him to speak. Not that he was able to anyway. He needed his breath to breathe through the pain and keep his hands from shaking. He isn't sure how he managed to shoot arrows and hit but he did. He kept his team safe as good as he could.

With a pained grunt he jumped down the last meter, he leaned against the wall and caught his breath and turned on his radio in case he didn't make it on his own.

"Hawkeye we have to leave NOW!" That was Redcliff's voice. He hated her with passion. She was always near and laid her dirty paws on Phil. She tried to woo him and that made his blood boil. Phil seemed oblivious to her advances but he didn't care much for him either. They drifted apart more and more and Phil didn't even notice. Maybe he did notice but didn't care?!

He had tried to get Phil's attention but failed, he was more annoying and present than normal but Phil seemed to avoid him during work. He even seemed irritated whenever Clint tried to get his attention.

Clint shook his head to clear his mind. It was not the time to brood about his personal life, they were in the field.

"Let me help," Natasha appeared out of nowhere, he looked startled. "Hi," he frowned.

She put his good arm around his shoulder and supported him as best she could. "Thanks," he smiled at her.

"You're welcome," she studied him, "Agent down, I repeat Agent down. Medics required."

"They don't have to come for me," Clint was determined to reach the medics on his own two feet.

"You can barely stand," she stated. "Don't play the tough guy."

"But I am the tough guy with the scary gaze," he joked.

Her features softened. "I know you're mister awesome," she mocked.

"Damn right," his legs gave out.

"Where the hell is he?" Tony sounded worried.

"He sulks because I forbid him to talk," she grinned.

"Hawkeye doesn't shut up, for no one," Tony hissed. "Maybe for Coulson sometimes but for no one else unless it's vital for an operation."

"Tony's right," Steve looked around. "Where did he hide?"

"I'm not sure." Banner pointed at a building, "but I think his arrows came that way."

"Hawkeye," Phil sighed; it was not the time to make a scene and his lover should know better than that.

"Agent down, I repeat Agent down. Medics required," Natasha's voice cracked through the radio.

"Hawkeye," Phil made out two figures and started to run, followed by the rest of the team.

Clint was on his knees as they reached him. "What happened?" Phil examined him.

"Got hit by a sting sir," Clint breathed heavily.

"You have to report dangerous injuries immediately," Phil chided.

"He tried," Natasha interfered, Phil looked at her with wide eyes. "You told him to shut up," she looked at Redcliff.

"He could have used the correct term for fatal injuries," she said coolly. Natasha wanted to jump her but Clint grabbed her wrist. "Don't," he said. She kneeled down next to him. Phil caught him as he passed out. He and Natasha dragged him to the EMT's. It was a hard task not to freak out.

"I want to go home," Clint's shoulder was heavily bandaged.

"You're lucky your still alive," Natasha said, the sting missed organs and important muscles.

"Rehab and rest," he sighed. "I'm out for weeks."

"But your alive," she repeated.

"Yeah I am alive," he smirked, "where is Phil?" Normally his lover came down to visit him when he got hurt.

"He writes the field report," she pursed her lips. "What happened between you?"

"I don't know," Clint shook his head. "I'm sure I didn't do anything wrong this time. But I am who I am you can never be sure."

"It's not always your fault," she smiled gently.

"But it is most of the time," he answered. "He started avoiding me even before Redcliff transferred to us. He is more tired and stressed out than usual but he doesn't talk about it."

"Is it possible you don't have the right security clearance," she offered an explanation, she didn't thought a previous conversation would repeat itself the first time she tried to coax information out of him.

He thought about it too but he couldn't find a sign that his lover was working on a side project, "I don't know."

"How is it at home?" She was curious, Clint was rarely clueless for long.

Clint shrugged. "He talks less, therefore I talk even more. He doesn't touch me anymore and he stopped spooning," he blushed at that. "He's busy with paper work, or he comes home late and goes straight to bed. Our happy family life is gone," he looked up at her with sad eyes, "Help me out of here."

She stood up and collected his clothes. "Here, you get five minutes to get dressed," she left the room to sign him out.

Phil finished his paperwork as fast as he could. Fury granted him three days off after he finished his field report.

He read and signed the other reports. "Done," he felt relived. Phil grabbed his jacket and hurried down to the medical unit.

"Hey Barton," he entered the room but it was empty. He felt how panic enclosed his heart, "Ma'am where is agent Barton?" Phil banished every emotion from his voice.

"He signed himself out. Two hours ago, sir," the nurse replied. Phil nodded and hurried to his car. "Damn Clint," he muttered as he started his car.

Phil broke every speed limit on his way home, praying that Clint would be there.

Clint sat on the couch with a water bottle in his hands, Natasha had left half an hour ago.

_~ I'd like to know what Phil's doing at the moment. Do you flirt with her? Or crack jokes? Do you give her the smile that belongs to me?_

_What have I done? Was I too demanding? Too annoying? Too undisciplined?_

_I know I'm nerve-wrecking, that's why I've got hit that much as a child. My personality is bad. Loud and annoying isn't good but I thought he doesn't care. I should have known better. Nobody stays in the end. I drive them away sooner or later. Barney and Mrs. Reid from the orphanage were right all along. I'm no good and a danger for myself and others ~_

He jerked as the front door burst open. "Clint?" he heard Phil call. He seemed distressed.

"I'm here," he called out, holding his shoulder. Pain shot trough it at the sudden movement.

Phil stood in front of him, panting. "Don't scare me like that."

"Sorry," Clint looked up at him.

"I entered your room and your bed was empty and freshly made," his hands shook. "I thought you died."

"I don't like it there," Clint said simply. "You know I tend to run."

"Normally you hide in my office," Phil reminded; normally he knew when he escaped.

"I thought you're too busy for my disturbance," Clint drank some water.

"Disturbance, how did you get that idea?" Phil settled down next to Clint.

"You didn't visit," it was a matter of fact; it tore on Phil's heart.

"I made a deal with Fury," Phil explained. "I finish all the paperwork and get three days off to care for you."

Clint tilted his head searching for something in his lover's eyes, "You take days off? For me?"

"Of course I do," Phil huffed. "I always do it one way or another."

"You didn't believe I'd come for you," Phil realized, daggers shot through his heart.

"Things changed since she came back," Clint was honest.

"The quicker she learns the quicker she's out of our life," Phil reassured.

"She shouldn't have to leave in the first place," Clint clenched his jaw.

"What do you mean?" Phil asked curious.

"You really don't understand, do you?" Clint wasn't sure it was a good or a bad sign but Phil's intention to spend the next few days with him was definitely a good sign.

"I love you nonetheless," Clint gave him a peck on the lip, the movement hurt.

"Come, lean closer," Phil guided his lover against his chest. "Don't ever be silent," he sniffed softly. Clint's eyes widened, "Are you crying?"

"Maybe," Phil's eyes were red-rimmed. Clint's features softened. "Don't, I am here," he took Phil's hand and put it over his heart. Phil enjoyed the strong beat of the heart and the heat radiating from Clint's body.

"I'll always be here, as long as you want me to," Clint kissed Phil's chest.

Phil put his arms around his lover and cried silently, his chin rested on Clint's head.

Clint rubbed soothing circles over Phil's leg. "Hush. We will be fine," he whispered soothing words.

Phil fell asleep after a while and Clint watched over him. He wanted to enjoy Phil's embrace and treasured the feeling of being loved. "We will be fine," said like a prayer.

::::::::::::::::::::::::

"Did you sleep at all?" Phil caught Clint watching him.

"Prefer watching you," he yawned.

"I know you do," Phil smiled and kissed him. "Lay down and I go to the bakery," he put a blanket over his lover.

"Be careful," Clint mumbled before his eyes dropped. Phil smiled and stroke through Clint's soft short hair.

In the middle of the bakery his phone began to ring. "Coulson," he sighed. It was Fury, they had new evidences against Veronica and he needed him immediately. "I'm on my way."

He went home first to drop off their breakfast and leave a note. "He'll be pissed," Phil looked at his lover, before he went to work.

"Coulson, take a seat," Fury set behind his desk. "We spread a few false information in addition to the lies you provide and informants from all over the world tell us that they heard about it. It seems she's selling the information we provide. I checked her bank account but she's too clever. I think she has a second bank account under false name."

"She tries to please us and she's a good field agent. I can't find any indication that she cooperates with the enemy," Phil didn't want to believe she was able to sell out SHIELD, to sell out their past relationship.

"I can see why your relationship is going south," Fury's expression darkened.

"What?" Phil frowned, Fury sounded like Clint.

"Do you love her?" Fury asked blunt.

"Of course not!"

"Are you sure?" Fury interrogated.

"Yes." Phil was sure, "but she's a friend."

"It's your job to befriend her for information and not for real. You can do that in case she's innocent but not now."

"I know sir," Phil felt bad about it. "But I have a problem with believing that she's a mole."

"People change Phil," Fury glared. "Your relationship might never have been real."

Phil paled at that thought, "It was."

"Two years Phil," Nick's features softened slightly, "Don't throw ten years away for a two years fling."

"It wasn't a fling." Phil took a deep breath, "I truly loved her."

"You have to choose," Nick gestured him to leave.

"What are you talking about, I have Clint," Phil stopped at the door.

Fury just shook his head and opened a file; Phil left the office and ran right into Veronica.

"Where have you been?" Clint washed his plate with one hand.

"At work," Phil changed into something more comfortable.

"Your meeting ended three hours ago. You promised to come home afterwards," Clint tried to dry the plate. Phil took the plate and towel out of his hands.

"Are you stalking me?"

"No, I was worried and called Nick," Clint snapped, he had an idea where his lover had been.

"I met Veronica and we had dinner together. She wanted to talk about the upcoming operation," Phil explained.

"You promised to come home," Clint clenched his fist. "What am I your little housewife? Waiting for her hubby to come home?"

"You knew what you got yourself into the day we met," Phil countered. "I have an important job to do, the safety of the world lies in our hands."

Clint opened his mouth to say something but decided against it, he took his jacket and left.

"You're not fit enough to go out on your own," Phil called out but Clint was already gone.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Phil needed the next two days to fix the mess he created but he wasn't able to close the rift between them. Even weeks later Clint kept his distance and Phil didn't understand why. He knew the op could put a strain on his relationship but he didn't do more than necessary.

He was faithful and never touched her more than absolutely necessary, wasn't it obvious to Clint that she was only a co-worker and friend?

"We have two weeks to prepare for the op," Phil pointed at his presentation . "We need more information about the surrounding but our spies are working on it."

"An unknown organization uses the warehouse to create robots, like the wasps and the whiplash copy," he showed them a mug shot. "That's Professor Dietrich, a German engineer and physicist."

"Is the source reliable?" Clint asked.

"Yes." Redcliff answered, "They never lied to us before."

"There's a first time for everything," he winked. "What about dinner?"

"No thank you," she said disgusted.

"She already has a date with our favorite Agent here," Tony pointed at Coulson. "We made a reservation weeks ago."

"It's the best restaurant in town" Steve beamed, Natasha groaned.

"A problem Ms. Romanoff?" Redcliff sneered.

"No," she shrugged.

"Ah, a dinner date! You dog," Clint grinned broadly at Phil. It was the best fake smile he could manage. Phil's heart constricted, "I didn't know I had a date today."

"Me neither but I'm looking forward to it," Redcliff said sweetly.

Clint wanted to puke ."Let's get back to the main topic before she wets her panties," he said and returned his gaze back to the photo.

"Agent Barton that was uncalled for," she chided.

"Aw, sensitive?" he mocked.

"I show you sensitive," she muttered. "Come on," he gestured.

She took a few deep breaths, she would get him for that. "You're not worth the trouble," she smiled.

"Touché, birdie boy. Seems like you're not daddies favorite anymore," Tony clicked his tongue.

"Enough," Coulson interfered. They stopped immediately.

"So you have date?" Clint stayed after everyone else left.

"I swear I didn't know," Phil put his file down.

"Don't go," Clint gripped Phil's belt and yanked him closer, nibbling his ear.

"The door isn't locked," Phil gasped.

"Don't mind," Clint continued

"But I do," Phil pushed him away. "Not at work that was the deal."

"You didn't answer my plea," Clint stepped back.

"I have to go," Coulson felt sorry for Clint.

"Why?"

"I can't tell you," he answered honestly.

"Top secret?" Clint huffed.

"Something like that, yeah," Phil nodded.

Clint took a deep breath before he took Phil's weapon out of its holster, he trailed his finger down the silver ring; there was something in Clint's eyes that worried Phil deeply.

"Clint, don't worry okay?" Phil cupped his cheek, "Okay?"

The younger man nodded before he put the weapon back and left.


	4. Divorce, don't you dare

"Let's go," Veronica beamed, that was the perfect opportunity to get information and piss off the damn sniper even more. Maybe I should seduce him too, she mused. Clint lay in the ventilator shaft above her office together with Natasha. She insisted to come along and he let her. She never followed him up there before, it was a sign that she cared.

"…Agent Barton is a menace," she sighed. "He's undisciplined and insolent. He isn't intelligent either."

"He can be irritating and bad-mouthed but he has a good heart," Phil said.

"He's a huge child," she finished her last report.

"That he is," Phil agreed.

"Why don't you reassign him?" She asked curious.

"He's a hand full and nobody wants to keep him longer than necessary," Phil explained.

"So why do you?"

"That was his best behavior this morning and I'm the only one who can keep him in check so I'm stuck with him. Fury would never reassign him," Phil hoped the explanation was enough.

"What do you do to dominate him?" she caressed his chest.

"I do what I have to do," he said cryptically, stepping a step back.

"He's loud and nerve-wrecking and you want to tell me he's on his best behavior?" She kissed his cheek, "You must be a saint to put up with him."

"What can I say I take in every stray," he led her out of the room.

Tears streamed down his face while he lay in the shaft, he looked so resigned and vulnerable that it tore on Natasha's heart, "Clint?"

"I knew the day would come," he whispered even though they were alone.

"What do you mean?"

"I'm loud, too cheerful, cheeky, rude and a menace," he stared down into the empty office.

"That's the way we love you," she took his hand. "That's the way we know you, I don't want you to change."

"But I drove him away," he swallowed hard. "They were right you know, I deserve what I get."

"No you never deserved what you got and you don't deserve this," she said hard.

He didn't say anything in return. "Come with me," she tugged on his hand.

Phil hated the 'date' with every fiber of his heart and wished he could go home. She was all over him and he felt rather dirty. Tony and Steve watched them from afar, grinning and gossiping. Phil finally understood what Clint's problem was. He didn't realize it sooner but she was hitting on him. He tried to befriend her and nothing more but Tony and Steve were talking nonstop about how perfect they are and how cute their children would be. It must have hurt Clint more than he thought. Phil realized that night that he had flirted back sometimes and gave her wrong signals that were the reasons why Nick told him to choose.

He owed Clint an apology. "It's late," he finally said and waved at the waitress.

"So what do we do now?" she said seductive.

"I go home," he said while he got up, she took it as an invitation to follow him. "Do you need a ride home before I leave?" he asked.

Her eyes widened in surprise, "I'd like to go home with you."

"No," he said, not even for the op.

"I thought we could revive our relationship," she pulled him closer for a kiss.

"No," he jerked away. "You and I that ended ages ago. We can be friends but nothing more."

"Hmpf," she huffed. "I'll get you back," she stormed out of the restaurant.

"What have you done?" Tony frowned.

"I'm not interested in her that way," Phil said and left.

"Trouble in paradise," Tony snickered.

Steve nodded.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::

"Okay," Tony rubbed his goatee. "I know, officially, you have a room here but since when do you actually live here?"

"Four days, six hours, forty two minutes and thirty six seconds," JARVIS interrupted.

"Thanks," Tony rolled his eyes.

"Natasha decided I need a change of scenery," Clint shrugged. He looked tired and pale.

"Do you actually sleep sometimes?" Banner asked curious.

"No. Why?" Clint gave him a suspicious look.

"Because you look dead on your feet," he replied.

"Thank you," he sipped on his coffee, Natasha returned with the mail. "Stark, Stark, Stark, Banner, Banner, Barton," she distributed.

"What's that?" Tony tried to get a look at Barton's letter. "Divorce papers," he said before he got up.

"Divorce? You're married?" Tony knocked over his mug.

"Why didn't you tell us you're married?" Steve sounded gentle, "We could have helped."

"Why does she leave you?" Banner pushed.

"Why does everyone think it's always my fault?" He hissed, "I want the divorce."

"Why? You seem unhappy with the decision," Steve got up and approached Clint.

"Do you think a divorce is fun? I married for a reason," he held his tears back. "Don't Steve please," he stepped away from Steve's open arms.

"I need some time, don't worry," he fled.

"He's married I can't believe it," Tony shook his head; he hated the fact that he didn't figure it out on his own.

"I can't believe they divorce," Natasha took a muffin.

"You knew?" Tony frowned. "Of course you knew."

"What kind of person is she?" Cap asked.

"Clint loves her very, very much, more than his own life and I hope they sort it out before one of them get truly hurt," she left, she had talked more than she should have but even the black widow had to talk from time to time.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Phil worked through a stack of files as an envelope caught his eyes.

He opened it and dropped it after he read it. "That's why you left," he buried his face in his hands, "divorce papers," he whispered to himself.

"You got what you asked for," Nick leaned against the doorframe. "We tried to warn you."

"How can I make him understand without telling him about it?" Phil countered.

"You shouldn't have flirted with her. You spent more time with her than with him. He was even more irritating than usual only to get your attention but you just snapped at him. What were you thinking?"

"I don't know," he took a deep breath. "I think it was a matter of pride. She broke my heart without a second thought and I want her to regret what she's done."

"The price is too high and she isn't worth it," Fury crossed his arms in front of his chest. "The enemy knows that we're coming. We have to make a backup plan and we head out four days earlier."

"She sold us out," Phil said out loud.

"She did." Nick nodded, "and I think she doesn't even know what loyalty means, or love."

"Romanoff says he's all right and I shouldn't worry. He moved in with the Avengers," Phil suppressed his tears. "I confirmed what he always feared."

"You're nothing like them but you have to make your point clear, you have to prove yourself again," Nick left.

Phil threw the divorce papers into the trash bin.

Clint avoided Phil the few times they visited HQ, it was hard to be there but he couldn't stand to see his husband.

Clint spent most of his free time with Tony in his lab, where he taught Clint how to cause mischief with help of modern technology. They rarely talked about none technology related matters but Tony got a little glimpse at the real Clint Barton.

Steve dragged Clint down to the gym whenever he seemed unsettled and taught him hand to hand combat. Clint knew damn well how to defend himself but you never finish your training, there is so much to learn.

Bruce left him alone most of the time but he was never far away.

Black Widow watched them from afar, she was happy that Clint finally bonded with his teammates but on the other hand she knew it wouldn't last. Clint needed Phil like the air to breath. He couldn't live without Phil; Phil pulled him out of his personal hell and guided him since then.

"What are you thinking about," Clint settled down next to her.

"You and Phil," she said.

"He doesn't call," Clint sighed.

"You don't call either," she looked at him.

"True," he agreed.

"A divorce isn't the answer," she was right.

"I want to see if he signs them or not. If he does than our whole relationship was a lie," he explained.

A small smiled tugged on her lips, "You can be clever."

"Sometimes," he chuckled, "We have to get ready."

At 6 a.m. sharp, the next morning, they boarded the helicarrier.

Clint settled down next to Natasha, Tony set down next to him. It was his way to offer comfort in case he needed it.

Phil watched his lover, the young man looked like hell but it seemed he finally bonded with them. "Barton," he risked it.

Clint's head shot up, not sure what to do. "Come here," Phil ordered him to a side room of the heli, away from curious eyes.

The young man obeyed. "Yes sir?" he stood straight and his voice was neutral.

"I finally know what I did wrong," Phil whispered.

"You do?" Clint mocked. "Yeah I do," Phil rubbed his face; light reflected from his wedding band.

Clint jaw dropped. "I'll not sign the divorce papers do you understand?" Phil took Clint's hand, took of the gloves and slipped a matching wedding band on his finger.

"Do you think the change of heart changes anything?" Clint hissed.

"No but I think it's a beginning," Phil seemed sad, "It wasn't my intention to flirt with her. It was never my intention to hit on her. She hurt my pride after she left and I wanted her to regret it, to show her that I don't need her love anymore. I have you and she can never compare to you. You're the only one for me and I can assure you it was not your fault."

"The rest of the story is kinda my fault," Fury joined them. "We think she is a spy and we ordered Phil to befriend her and get information. Now we know, she is a spy."

"It was an op all the time?" Clint gaped.

"Yes but it got out of hand and I'm sorry," Phil sounded so honest that Clint wanted to believe him.

"How do I know that this isn't a plot too," he put on his glove.

"You don't," Fury said. "You have to trust us."

"I have to think about it, 'cause I know that you love me but I'm not sure you're still in love with me," Clint joined the others.

"Ouch," Nick stated.

"Just say it. I told you so," Phil watched Clint walk away.

"No," Fury shook his head. "I think what he just said is punishment enough", Phil nodded his head in agreement.

"Damn," Tony yelled.

Steve jerked, ready to fight.

"What?" Thor looked confused.

"Coulson wears a sweet little wedding band," Tony smirked. "Did you marry hear without telling us?" he pointed at Redcliff.

"No, sorry to disappoint you," Phil rubbed his ring gently. "I'm scared I put my wife in harm's way when I wear my ring but she had pretty good arguments. She tries for years to change my mind."

"And what changed your mind?" Redcliff glared.

"Her arguments get better and better," he smiled a true smile. Clint gave Natasha a knowing look but she just shrugged.

"Maybe you could save your marriage too," Tony offered, "a little gesture can change anything."

"I'm not sure if it's not too late already," he leaned back in his seat rubbing his glove right above the ring. A little smile spread over his face before he closed his eyes. Phil was there, he was safe, maybe it wasn't too late after all.

Tony's eyes went wide as he truly realized that Phil was married. "Damn, we tried to split up a marriage. Your wife must hate us."

"She hates your gut at the moment that's true," Phil rubbed his forehead.

Steve blushed furiously, "Please tell her it wasn't our intention to hook you up with someone else while your wife waited for you at home."

"I think you'll be fine. She's angrier with me anyway."

"Sorry," Tony grimaced.

"Don't worry. The whole incident taught me a lesson," Phil's glance was unreadable.


	5. We belong together

"Hawkeye wake up," a gentle hand shook him. "Five minute's sir," Clint mumbled.

"Now," was the order. Clint jerked awake. "Yes sir," he got his quiver and bow before he left the heli. Tony and Steve laughed. Banner grinned and Redcliff sent him a glare.

"You're so whipped," Natasha smirked.

"Don't tell anyone," he didn't deny it because it was true, sometimes.

Phil shook his head at their banter.

"It's time," Fury appeared with a few guards in tow. "Veronica Redcliff I arrest you. We charge you with intelligence, selling of information and a lot more," an agent cuffed her.

"I'm innocent," she used her best puppy look. "Phil please believes me."

"We collected enough evidence to get you behind bars. For a very long time," Phil stated, not looking sorry at all.

"You used me," she played hurt. "You used me for your own benefit."

"You used me to gain information," Phil retorted, "but we knew you would try your luck."

"Damn you," she hissed, "You'll pay."

Clint's hand twitched, no one threatened his husband without consequence but there was nothing he could do.

Phil waved at her before he left to brief his team.

"She's a spy?" Tony's jaw dropped. "We tried to set up a married man with a spy? We're so damned."

"I can't believe she betrayed us," Steve shook his head. "She's such a nice lady," he sighed.

"Obviously not," Bruce glared at her, his skin turning slightly green.

"That answers a few questions," Black Widow stated, her arms crossed in front of her chest.

"She's doomed," Clint grinned. "Let's give her the boot. SHIELD got a nice little jail in the middle of a desert, oh or Siberia the jail is great too."

"Do I want to know what kind of jails SHIELD got?" Tony frowned and Coulson just shook his head.

"I thought so," Tony closed his helmet.

"She sold us out but we've got three more teams. We are the diversion. They know we're coming and they translocated parts of their equipment but they couldn't move all of it. We keep them busy and our teams will storm warehouses in different locations," Fury held his speech short.

"Let's go," Steve lifted his shield.

Hawkeye found a nice little place near the warehouse. Three special agents placed bombs around the building. The main personal was long gone but SHIELD could take the building down. Tony, Steve and Banner waited for an opportunity to strike. They didn't have to wait long.

The organization left a little army in the warehouse, "Iron man, take the right side, Captain America left. Hulk… do what you do best. Thor secure the back."

"Hulk smash house," he cheered, Phil groaned.

"Hawkeye talk to me," Phil ordered after Clint kept radio silence for too long.

"I thought I shouldn't break radio silence," he could hear Clint's smile in his voice.

"I told you never stop talking," Phil reminded him of the evening in their living room.

"Thought it was a private thing, sir."

"No. A silent Hawkeye is scary. Remember the last time you kept silent for too long. It's never a good sign. You tend to get into too much trouble then," Phil sounded neutral.

"Yes sir. I can do that," Hawkeye broke radio silence every two minute.

"Explosive charges are in position," Hawkeye said before he took down a soldier who tried to defuse one of the bombs.

"Retreat," Phil ordered. "You've got 15 seconds."

Tony flew with Captain America out of harm's way. Thor got Hulk out of the way and Clint jumped from the building on a tree and ran for it.

"That went well," Thor swung Mjölnir.

"Too well," Clint eyed the surrounding.

"Hahaha," Redcliff began to laugh. "Do you think we are stupid?"

"Damn," Fury looked around, not seeing anything.

"Do you hear that?" Tony asked. It was a humming noise.

"There," Steve pointed at a huge robot. "Don't you have something different? Whiplash again? Come on," Tony started to fly.

The fight was harder than they expected, they had made some changes to the robot.

Hulk threw heavy debris at the robot and Clint got hit by a ricochet. He got a bleeding head wound and Phil hoped he would be alright. Iron man tried to distract the robot with his repulsors while Captain America threw his shield with full force, disconnecting the head from the body. Thor had some trouble to protect the others from Hulk.

"Worked as well as last time," Thor boomed cheerfully.

"Almost," Clint sighed and swayed slightly.

"How is the head my friend?" Thor asked worried.

"I'll live," Clint squeezed his eyes shut for a moment.

"So Redcliff time to pinch you," Fury grabbed her arm.

"You're not the only one with a sniper," she announced and two agents went down with a bullet in the head.

Fury raised his hands, "Clever. What do you want?"

She took his weapon out of his holster, "Freedom."

"We can't grant you that," Fury glared at her.

"You have no choice or Phil gets a third eye," she said smiling.

Clint looked around and tried to make out the sniper. "Gotcha," he smiled and fired an arrow.

Veronica turned around, her eyes widened and she fired at Barton, hitting him in the back.

"Marc," she used her radio. "Marc can you hear me?"

"He never misses," Fury overpowered her.

Phil's heart stopped the moment the bullet hit. Clint had ignored his own safety and aimed at the sniper even though he knew he could provoke to get shot. Clint looked surprised as the bullet hit, it seemed as if he wanted to say something but he couldn't use his voice.

Phil caught him before he hit the ground. "Clint," he felt for a pulse, relieved to find one.

"Clint, wake up," tears threatened to spill, he was too shaken to hold them back completely.

Phil looked up at Redcliff. "We need her alive but not in one piece," Fury offered him a chance.

In the blink of an eye she lost both kneecaps, Phil put his gun down next to Clint.

Veronica screamed with pain and sank to the ground, screaming even more as she landed on her knees. The Avengers were surprised at Coulson's outburst. He just shot an unarmed woman.

"I told you to talk that was an order," Phil used his best boss-man tone.

"Always so bossy," Clint whispered. "Hurts."

"I know it hurts. The bullet penetrated your vest", Phil stroke Clint's forehead.

"We have to move him, we can't wait for the medics to arrive," Fury ordered. "Thor carry him into the shuttle."

Thor nodded and picked Clint up as gentle as he could. Phil and the others followed instantly.

Clint lay on blankets on the ground his head rested in Coulson's lap.

Clint moved his hand from time to time not sure if he could take Phil's hand or not. "Just take it," a gentle voice told him and he did. Phil took Clint's hand into his own and held it tight "Don't let go."

"No sir," Clint whispered.

"Cut the crap," Phil kissed his temple. "Time to come out," he whispered. Clint smiled, "Like that."

"I know," he took off Clint's glove to reveal the wedding band underneath. "We belong together," he whispered into Clint's ear.

"Dear god," Steve gasped while he watched them interact.

"How long?" Tony looked startled.

"We are married for three years but we are together for…," Phil thought about it. "I can't even remember when exactly it happened. Sometimes within the last ten years."

"Always loved him. Love to make him angry too," Clint tried hard to stay awake.

"I know you do," Phil rubbed a tear away.

"Hush," Clint squeezed his hand. "Don't worry so much."

"Easy to say when you're not the one who has to watch his husband bleed out," Phil snapped.

"'m not going… anywhere," Clint promised.

"Promise?" Phil knew it was childish but he needed it.

"Promise," Clint agreed, "or Widow will kick my ass."

"That's what sisters are for," she confirmed.

"Sister?" Thor was totally confused by now.

"She's family," Clint choked out, "not by blood but by choice."

"Damn right," she got up and settled down next to Phil.

"I'm so sorry," Phil mumbled.

"You had your reasons. I need time to understand the whole story but you tried to make it right. It's worth a lot," Clint's eyelids grew heavy.

"Don't leave me," Phil tilted his head back and stared at the ceiling of the vehicle. He missed the times Hawkeye watched him from above, hitting him with paper balls or rubber pieces.

"You're gay. I can't believe it. You're fucking him for ten years," Veronica gritted out.

"It's not about the gender, it's about the personality," Phil looked at her. "He has a gentle soul. He is a big kid but only because he never learned how to be an adult. He had to grow up so fast that his heart and soul couldn't keep up with the pace. He got hurt a lot as a child, mentally, physically, and he needed a way to cope. He tries to be cheerful and remote. There was so less happiness in his life that he creates his own idyllic world. It can be irritating but I love him the way he is. Nothing will ever change that," he made it clear that he never shared her opinion concerning Hawkeye.

"Must be bad," Clint said in a pained voice, "you're talking too much, n'tasha said sister. I have to die, right?"

"NO," Phil leaned forward. "No, you will not die. We're just trying to keep you awake."

"He's immature and a disgrace. I don't understand why SHIELD kept him. I would have eliminated him after the first year," Veronica spit.

"He's the best," Fury stood up and hit 'accidently' against her knee. "He's the best sniper and he is irreplaceable."

"I am already dead," Clint groaned. "Shut up," Phil snapped, his eyes widened. "No scratch that, keep talking."

"You're weak, I can't remember you that way," she insulted, "and I can't imagine that you're a good husband. I got the creeps every time I thought you might propose to me."

Clint's posture stiffened and for one frightening moment Phil thought he might try to pounce on her. "He's a damn good husband," he panted. "He cares for me, he's there for me."

"You're just modest," she hissed. "His job is his top priority; he'll let you down once he climbs up the career ladder."

"He's my top priority," Phil glared at her, "He always was, is and will be. I can't be around 24/7 but I try. I keep him safe no matter what."

"Possessive," she raised a brow, "why are you so anxious to keep him safe?"

"Did you ever love someone?" Phil put some pity in his voice just to piss her off.

"Don't you dare pitying me," she huffed, "Of course I loved."

"No you didn't. If you ever loved someone you would know why I want to keep him safe." Phil chuckled sadly, "Look at him. He did what he did to protect me. He knew the risk. Save me and get shot or stand by and get me shot. He chose my life."

"He's an idiot," she clenched her jaw.

"The kid is a damn good friend," Tony glared at her. "He would sacrifice himself for all of us. If you were a friend he would even protect you."

She kept quiet and seemed thoughtful while she stared at Clint.

"Love you too," Clint closed his eyes while a gentle smile graced his lips. _Clint, CLINT_, a voice followed him into his dreams.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Phil sat next to Clint's hospital bed, waiting for his lover to wake up.

"I can't believe how much luck he had," Natasha held the other hand. The bullet missed his backbone only by a centimeter. The doctors stopped the inner bleeding and set his broken ribs.

He had a bad concussion but was lucky enough not to break his skull.

"He's awesome," Phil chuckled.

"heard… that," Clint mumbled.

"It lives," Natasha smirked.

"… suck your brain out," he hissed, his whole body ached, "or not."

"Don't move," Phil placed a hand against his chest. "You broke two ribs, the concussion is bad and the bullet almost hit your backbone."

"Almost?" Clint sounded relieved, "I thought I'd end up in a wheelchair."

"Why didn't you tell me so," Phil frowned.

"And scare you even more?" Clint tilted his head, "I thought it's easier for you when I don't freak out."

Phil sighed deeply, "And people ask why I love you," he placed a soft kiss on Clint's lips before he helped him to drink.

"Better?" Phil put the glass down.

"Yeah," Clint swallowed. "How long was I out? You look like hell."

"I look like hell? You should look into a mirror." Phil huffed, not answering his question.

"Almost a week," she said, "they put you into a coma."

Clint grabbed Phil's hand. "Go home and get some rest. I'll be fine for a few hours," he was sleepy.

"I take a shower and sleep there," he pointed at the second bed in the room.

"How long did you bug the staff before they got the bed into the room?" Clint yawned.

"He needed one angry glance and the staff surrendered," Natasha got up, "and now rest. You can barely keep your eyes open."

Clint nodded and regretted the move as his stomach churned. "Deep breaths," Phil caressed his forehead. Clint fell asleep enjoying Phil's gentle touch.

The next time Clint woke he saw Steve and Tony leave; it felt nice to know that they cared enough to visit.

He glanced at the other bed; it was empty. "Mr. Workaholic," he smiled lovingly.

"Nope. Just had to pee," he heard Phil call out before he heard him flush.

"You should get some paperwork done or the pile will grow and grow and grow," Clint still smiled.

"I have a meeting in an hour but I'll come back immediately," Phil promised.

"No lunch dates?" Clint winced as Phil expression darkened, "It wasn't my intention to be mean."

"It's my own fault," Phil sat down on the bed. "I can't even put into words how sorry I am. I love you and you're the only one in my heart. I… I might have flirted from time to time but I always thought of you. I never doubted my love for you. I wanted to believe that she was the woman I once loved. I wanted to be her friend, we had fun back then and I thought we could be something like good friends but I never intended to start a romantic relationship with her. I think I even wanted to show her that I don't need her anymore.

She left my life and destiny shoved me into your direction. I never believed in soul mates before I met you but you … you're so different. You fill the emptiness in my heart and soul. I feel loved and safe. I can't describe how incredible intense these feelings are."

"You don't need to explain anything." Clint caressed Phil's cheek, "I know what you're talking about. I feel them too and I appreciate that you try to put your feelings into words."

Phil leaned into the touch and pressed a kiss against his lover's palm, "Rest and I'm back before you even realize that I'm gone."

Clint chuckled, "Ow, ."

"You're such a child," Phil laughed.

"But you love me anyway," Clint smirked.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

"Geez, agent Barton," a young doctor entered his room. "I hoped we would never meet again."

"Nice to see you too," Clint spat. He hated Dr. Jensen.

"What did you do this time?" he seemed bored.

"Saved my superiors life, rescued the world. Nothing new." Clint glared at him, "How was Hawaii?"

"Nice," he spent the last two weeks in Hawaii with his wife.

"Ahh, newlyweds," Clint mocked.

"You'll never know the feeling," the doctor smirked.

Clint laughed, "Where's the security?"

"Do I need them again?"

"Come on I know they're right in front of that door in case I try to murder you," Clint shifted slightly.

Jensen's wife, fiancée at that time, had hit on Clint a few months ago and the dear doctor blamed it on Clint.

After a mission went wrong he ordered two security guards to hold Clint still while he poked at him. He had the reputation to be a pain in the ass and he tended to kick doctors every now and again. Clint came to his senses and freaked out. He thought they were part of the enemy forces and lashed out until they sedated him. Jensen always sedated him heavier than necessary and made more tests than he should.

Clint remembered that he had hit Phil too, a few weeks later after a nightmare. Phil had hovered over him and got a shiner in return. Natasha had broken Clint's nose as he tried to free her from her nightmares a few years before the incident with Phil. Clint even spotted Tony with a bruise on his jar one morning. Steve had fussed over him the whole day and it was clear where the bruise came from.

Nightmares were a curse but it was even more painful to live with the aftermath.

"You shouldn't have hit on my wife," Jensen looked at the clipboard. "Nice, you almost got your spine split and your skull. Couldn't you do us all the favor and get yourself killed. Would spare us a lot of trouble."

"Where's the fun in that," Clint tried to move, he didn't like the glitter in the man's eyes.

"Barton, Barton, Barton." Jensen tilted his head, "You're a damn womanizer. I love my wife and I won't give her up."

"I know that and I can only repeat that she hit on me," Clint sighed.

"Morris said that you hit on his wife too,"

"It was a friendly banter," he rolled his eyes. "We know each other for years."

"Kunal?"

"She deals out our service weapons," he said blunt.

"Carlson?"

"Look man. I'm not interested in one of these women. I'm in a happy relationship for years. Married for three of them," Clint explained.

Jensen looked shocked for a moment. "Sure," he mocked, not believing him.

"I'm totally in love and devoted to that person. That person has to shoot me to get rid of me." Clint made his point, he raised his hand. "See? Wedding band?"

"If you get hurt again I might take your offer and shoot you," Phil leaned against the door frame.

"Love you too, sir," Clint sighed deeply.

"I can't leave you out of sight, can I?" Phil sat down on the chair next to Clint's bed, intertwining their fingers to show off the matching rings. "How do you manage to get into trouble every hour?"

"You're exaggerating," Clint raised a brow.

Phil just clicked his tongue while he watched Jensen, "I know you."

"Agent Coulson, sir?" Jensen stood ramrod straight.

"You're the one with the easy fiancée," he said, Jensen's face turned red from anger.

"Wife," Clint whispered audible.

"Huh? Nah, let's face it she needs the money," Phil deadpanned; Clint had a hard time not to laugh out loud.

"With all due respect, but you have no right to insult my wife," Jensen clenched his fists.

"First: you insulted my husband first. Second: he never hit on her, she hit on him. I was there and she's lucky I didn't shoot her. Third: I thought she left you for Bennet, obviously I'm mistaken. Fourth: I f you insult or mistreat my husband ever again I'll shoot you. No dismissal, no court just … short shrift. Do you understand doctor?" Phil was dead serious.

Jensen paled and nodded. "I give Dr. Collins a call," he pointed at the door and left.

"That was fun," Clint beamed, Phil gave him a big grin in return. "Don't get used to it. Or we're seriously in trouble."

"Spoil sport," Clint snorted, "but I will not stop to scare the fledglings," he added.

Phil looked amused. "I encourage you to scare them. Their scared faces brighten my day. We've got a fan club. Last time you scared one of the kids you had thirty three spectators."

"Only thirty three?" Clint pouted.

Phil chuckled, "Don't pout, I'm still amazed how thirty three people fit into the tiny men's room."


	6. Coddling the archer, Mr Coulson?

Clint got released two weeks later. Tony persuaded them to move in with the Avengers at least 'till Clint recovered. He had a few good arguments.

Clint was never alone and JARVIS kept an eye on him while they worked. It was the perfect solution. Coulson was happy to see Clint interact with his friends. Clint never had many friends but the Avengers stole his heart. He trusted them and they trusted him. Phil realized that his family gained more members.

Tony wasn't sure if he made the right decision as he invited Coulson into his home. The Agent was a highly reserved bad-ass and the past week had been even more strenuous than they were used to. Coulson's mood had been frightening broody. He yelled and snapped at every human being. Minutes before a meeting Steve had pushed Tony 'accidently' into a door just to claim they had to visit infirmary immediately to check him out for injuries.

Thor claimed he had to visit his mother because he forgot her birthday, Phil new enough about mythology to know that Frigga had reached an age where women rather deny they were born at all than celebrate. Thor got grounded and had to cancel his date with Jane. Phil was at least gracious enough to let him choose. House arrest or Phil would tell his mother that she raised a liar. It wasn't hard to choose. Banner was clever enough to dig himself in his lab and Natasha had just watch the spectacle with a smirk.

"Oh god," Tony groaned. "They're on their way."

"Why did you offer to let them stay?" There was sarcasm in Steve's voice.

"I thought it … it was the right thing to do," Stark confessed. Steve had to smile and praised himself for his good influence on the billionaire.

"I don't like house arrest," Thor pouted. Natasha got up, "You're lucky he just grounded you," she walked away with a grin on her face. She knew Phil got unbearable when he wasn't able to spent time with Clint for days because of his busy schedule but once they were together for a few minutes his mood changed instantly.

"I don't want to know what she meant," Tony rubbed his face, "I don't even understand what the hell Clint sees in him."

"Me neither," Banner put in his two cents.

"Love is…a strange thing," there was nothing Steve could say, he wanted to defend Clint's feelings but he didn't understand it either, "but it seems Phil cares about him too."

"Seems that way," Tony remembered their last op.

"Hey guys missed me?" Clint appeared with Natasha and Phil in tow minutes later.

"Not really," Tony mocked. Clint played hurt and put a hand above his heart, "You wound me my friend."

"You'll live," Tony smirked.

"Sit down," Coulson interrupted, it wasn't the first time he visited the mansion and Jarvis actually authorized him to use the kitchen. "What do you want?"

"Let me help," Clint walked in the direction of the kitchen.

"No," Phil glared.

"Yes," Clint didn't back down. Steve frowned at Tony, "That's new," he mouthed, Stark nodded.

"No, that's my last word," Phil tried to stay hard.

"Yes," Clint passed him.

"You'll sit down and watch," Coulson called out.

"Hahahaa, you wish," they heard the amusement clearly in his voice.

"Damn brat," Phil muttered and followed, ignoring their grins.

"Hey what do you want?" Clint reappeared. They shrugged in surprise. "Casserole it is," he vanished again, leaving his stunned teammates behind.

"Ok I'm too nosy to stay here," Tony strolled into the kitchen, followed by his equally nosy friends.

"Let me help," Clint demanded. Phil swatted his hand away giving him a glare. "Okay," Clint pouted and sat down.

Phil sighed, he took two potato peeler and various vegetables, "You can help with the vegetable," he sat down next to Clint.

"Let us help too," Steve rolled up his sleeves before he got a knife.

"Let me finish the rest," Phil said after a long while. "Do you want to walk around for a bit?"

Clint shifted uncomfortably. "Yeah," he got up and walked up and down the kitchen, he had promised Phil to stay close. The older man kept a close eye on his lover while he finished peeling the last vegetable. Clint's doctor suggested Clint to stay longer but the young man refused. Phil had tried to persuade him to extend his stay but Clint hated infirmary too much.

"Phil?" Coulson looked directly at Clint waiting for him to continue, "I don't feel so good."

Phil got up like a flash and put an arm around his husband, "You need rest but you never listen."

"I don't want you to worry," Clint placed his forehead against Phil's.

"I worry more when you push yourself far enough to confess you feel sick," his tone softened. Gone was the moody Agent they had to endure the whole week.

"I know," Clint whispered. "Get some rest before dinner, okay?" Phil placed a soft kiss on Clint's lips.

"I look after him," Natasha appeared, she had brought Phil's bag into Clint's room.

"Thank you," Tony rubbed his ears to make sure he wasn't suffering from sudden hearing loss but it was real, an honest and warm thank you had left Phil Coulson's mouth.

"Stop starring, it's rude," Phil interrupted Tony's thoughts.

"That's more like you," Tony blurted out.

Phil raised a brow. "I'm indeed capable to show human emotions," he said.

"We can see that my friend," Thor looked thoughtful.

"He would never put up with me if I try to control him," Phil justified his demeanor.

"He orders you around," Banner looked up from his magazine.

"We're both a little bossy but yeah I let him have his fun and I like having his attention," Phil explained.

"Your love runs deep," Thor's eyes gleamed.

Phil smiled gently, "You can't even imagine how deep."

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

"Lay down before you pass out," Phil pulled his lover closer. Clint pulled his legs up onto the couch and rested his head in Phil's lap. Their joint dinner was fun but it had been exhausting, too.

"I want to see that," Clint whined as Tony tried to change the channel.

"Okay, okay," Tony put up his hands in surrender.

"Why, you don't even like the movie," Phil nagged.

"I know." Clint snuggled against Phil, "but you do."

Phil's expression was absolutely heartwarming; you could practically feel the love radiating from Coulson.

"I still can't believe it," Tony muttered. He wasn't disgusted at all but he hadn't seen this one coming.

"How did it start?" Steve smiled at them. Clint looked so young while he lay there and even Phil looked years younger.

"Phil found me on the street," Clint held Phil's hand.

"You found yourself a stray?" Tony smirked at Phil.

"Yeah," he put his free hand on top of Clint's head, stroking through the soft hair.

"I left the circus, I loved to be an artist but I couldn't stand the life anymore. They taught me all I know but they didn't treat me well. No one ever did," he trusted them enough to be honest. "I was a mistake and my parents treated me like one. The orphanage wasn't homely either. They didn't have much money and they treated us like dirt. The next station was the circus. I had talent and they made me work hard. I practiced until my hands bled and my back ached. I got food when I was perfect, if not I had to go to bed with an empty stomach. I wasn't perfect at all but I learned fast. I had to learn fast. I love my bow," he smiled gently, "It's soothing."

"It was cold and rainy. He's a great pickpocket too. He stole my wallet and I caught him. I followed him into a back alley and he shot an arrow. Luckily he didn't aim to kill, I didn't know that back then but I'm grateful now." Phil sighed deeply, "I offered him a job and he agreed. After two years we met again. He finished his training and was assigned to O'Brian."

"I hate him," Clint closed his eyes, the movie wasn't interesting and he didn't need open eyes to recall the past.

"I know you do." Phil chuckled, "but I think he hates you more."

"Nooo," Tony mocked, "Sorry, what happened then?"

"Did you irritate him my friend?" Thor asked.

"Oh he did," Phil grinned. "O'Brian surrendered after the first week and he's a bad-ass."

"Nope. You're a bad-ass. O'Brian was just uptight," Clint interfered.

"After O'Brian Clint was assigned to Koslowsky."

"How long?" Steve's eyes gleamed.

"Two days," Phil raised a brow. "I'm not sure what happened."

"I hid her uniforms. She had to wear hot pants and a bra for the meeting; you can imagine that no one offered her a spare uniform," Clint didn't sound sorry at all. "What? We were in the middle of the desert. It was hot, the weather I mean."

"Uh-hu," Tony wiggled his brow.

"Oh, now I understand why the report vanished years ago," Phil nodded. "You're the devil."

"Nah, just bored," Clint said nonchalantly.

"Who was next?" Banner pushed.

"Hill, she survived him four months," Phil looked at Banner. "He disobeyed orders, didn't communicate with her and was … well his behavior wasn't the best. After that he was assigned to Boyd."

"He almost got me killed," Clint whined.

"I know that's why I took you off his team," Phil squeezed his hand.

"You always watched out for me," Clint squeezed back.

"I did."

"So nothing changed," Steve smiled, Phil was very protective of Barton.

"Nothing," Phil agreed. "Boyd ordered Clint to stay put even though he knew there was a bomb inside the building."

"My insubordination saved my life." Clint chuckled, "and people always said that's what gets me killed one day."

"What happened to Boyd?" Tony asked curious.

"He's somewhere in Siberia," Phil grinned, "Latrine fatigue for the rest of his life."

"Clint I want to apology for everything I ever said or will say that might offend you," Tony bowed before he refilled his glass. They laughed.

"Fury decided to assign Barton to me because it was my fault they had to put up with him.

The first few months were absolutely nerve-wrecking. We were constantly arguing and fighting, but things changed after I saved his life. I got hurt pretty bad and he stayed by my side the whole time. Natasha tried to persuade him to leave the hospital but he didn't. She was new, too and Clint didn't trust her at all. He stayed for days. The first thing I remember after I woke up was the feeling of a warm strong hand on mine. And there he was the undisciplined, disloyal menace of SHIELD. Holding my hand with worry in his eyes," Phil shivered at the memory. "That was the day I gained his trust and respect."

"I realized you truly cared. I knew you were different, no matter how much you played SHIELD's perfect soldier, your eyes gave you away. No one ever cared for me as much as you did," Clint caressed Phil's knee.

"Yeah and now you're stuck with a whole family," Steve half joked.

Clint just smiled.

"Please continue," Thor was fascinated by the story.

"We worked together for a few months and his behavior changed slowly but steady. He got rid of his authority problem. Almost. He's able to work with different handlers by now. Maria doesn't want to shoot him anymore. She's overly happy to give him back after a mission though," Phil laughed.

"I wanted to make you proud and nothing scared me more than your anger, that was disturbing. Still is," it was nice to let people in and Clint knew they'd never betray his trust. They were fucked up but good at heart.

"Coulson without Clint, that's what I call disturbing," Natasha settled down next to Thor.

"Care to elaborate on your opinion?" Coulson's cheeks turned slightly red.

"Every time someone borrows him Coulson's mood darkens," she explained, "he yells, he snaps, I mean you all ran from him all week... He almost ripped Fury's head of once."

"How did that happen?" Clint was curious, "You never told me about it."

"Uhm, he sent you on a mission and I came to know that the mission wasn't as easy as he told me it would be, else I would have never sent you. Fury knew that," Phil blushed, beating around the bush.

Natasha chuckled. "He yelled at Fury and threatened to shoot him in case you got hurt and Nick couldn't yawn for a week," she winked.

Their eyes widened. "Good you're a friend of Fury then," Thor sounded joyful.

"I had to handle extra paperwork for months," Phil mumbled.

Clint grinned, "Which mission?"

"Syria," Phil sighed.

Clint frowned. "I did get hurt then."

"You changed your mind?!" Steve tried to hide a smirk.

"I can't actually shoot my superior, can I?" Phil rolled his eyes, "and I was happy he survived at all."

"I broke my wrist," Clint remembered.

"Yeah," Natasha raised a brow, "and your skull, and one of your ribs and you tore your liver."

"Like I said," Phil inhaled deeply. "I was happy he survived."

"It was the last time for years I had to work without you," Clint realized. "He always sent the three of us, he still does if not absolutely necessary."

"Seems Tony isn't the only one who tends to get himself almost killed on a regular basis," Steve glared at his lover.

Tony grimaced, "Ha-ha." Clint enjoyed their banter.

"Please continue," Thor pushed.

"I followed him around like a love sick puppy," Clint remembered. "I watched him from above. I dragged him to the cafeteria with me. I did anything for his attention and I think one day he took pity on me."

"I was hopelessly in love with you and I just hoped you did what you did to signal that you feel the same," Phil replied, "that's why I asked you out."

"The date was fun," Clint's voice dripped with sarcasm. Phil snorted.

"That bad?" Banner broke his silence.

Phil clicked his tongue, "We got take-out, headed home, ended up in the middle of Chile, bruised and scratched, we saved the world, got patched up and fell into bed together. That was our first date."

Tony burst out laughing. "That was the adrenalin," he winked.

"Yeah and years of unresolved sexual tension," Natasha sighed.

"You're just jealous," Clint yawned.

"Definitely not," she made a face.

"We love you too," Clint's breathe evened out.

"How was your marriage?" Steve was curious.

"We had a little ceremony in a small church outside of town. Fury was my best man and Natasha was Clint's uhm best-woman," Phil winked at her. She flipped him off.

Tony choked on his drink at the thought, "Fury and Widow. I wish I had seen that."

"It was a beautiful wedding," she said, a gentle smile graced her lips. "I've got a copy of the video somewhere."

Thor cheered and persuaded her to bring the video along one day.

"I've never thought you could be human," Tony blurted out.

"I have to maintain a reputation," Coulson looked down at Clint.

"It's nice to know you're human though," Tony's eyes softened. "He loves you very much."

"I know," Phil sounded self confident. "I love him too. I can't imagine my life without him anymore. He's always around; whatever I do he stands beside me. I don't deserve him at all."

"Don't sell yourself short," Banner said, "He deserves unconditional love and protection and you're his choice. His heart knows what it deserves."

Phil smiled down at his lover, the flood of emotion was overwhelming but it felt good.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

"Stop fussing," Clint sighed. Phil brought him a pillow, "No."

"Phil," Clint said gentle. "I feel better and you can go back to work, really."

"No, I took personal leave," Phil lay down next to him; he liked the room Tony gave them.

"You don't have to," Clint shifted to get a better look at Phil. "You love your job."

"I love you more," Coulson watched his lover. "I meant what I said. You are more important. I neglected you for years. I realized that I can't have both."

"You can. It worked for years."

"It worked because you put up with all the shit."

"We work together, we go home together if possible, we share a home and duty. I like our life."

Phil licked his lips, "I want to spend more time with you, without paperwork. I want to eat lunch with you again, everyday. I want to take you out, like we used to. I want to treasure you the way you deserve it. I want the world to know that your mine. Are you crying?"

"Maybe," Clint sniffed, "but tears of joy. I'm not used to these kinds of tears; I don't know how to hide them."

"You don't have to hide anything," Phil put his hand on Clint's chest, "it's part of my job as a husband to encourage you to let out your emotions. I thought you know that by now. I'm not your father, I'm not your brother, I'm not a member of the orphanage and I'm not an artist. I'm your husband, I'm your friend, I'm everything you need me to be."

"I know," Clint smiled gently. "I would like to go out tonight."

"I don't think you're fit enough," Phil considered.

"Cinema? Picnic? Bar? HQ?" Clint used his best kicked puppy look.

"HQ?" Phil frowned, "absolutely not, no work. A bar is not safe enough. It's too cold for a picnic; it's not good for your health."

"What do you want to watch?" Clint got up to get his laptop, ignoring Phil's protest.

They went to their first date in months. Clint enjoyed the affection he got from Phil in public. It was pleasant to be a normal couple, no hiding, and no pretending.


	7. Scream fledgling, scream

Clint was cleared for field work after two months and spent most of his days at Phil's office. Their relationship wasn't a rumor anymore it was a fact.

"Hi, I'm Regina Harris," a young woman greeted her new co-worker, "and that's Robert Carmichael."

"Fresh from the academy?" Sitwell asked.

"Yes it's our first week," she replied.

"Do you like it?" Darcy smiled.

"Oh yeah," she said.

"and you Carmichael?" Darcy eyed him.

"It's hard but I think I'll be okay," he was honest, she liked that.

"Oh," Harris blushed, "there he is," she pointed at Coulson.

Carmichael looked up, "That's the one? He seems pretty uptight."

"He's one of our best field agents. Only the best join his team, he's with the Avengers at the moment."

Her eyes widened in awe. "I want to ask him out," she blurted out. Carmichael groaned.

"I wouldn't do that," Sitwell stated.

"Why? I watch him all week. He's strong and pretty and..."

"Taken," Darcy interrupted.

"I'm sure she's nothing compared to me," she winked.

Sitwell snorted.

"It's not okay to approach a taken man," Darcy chided.

"The relationship is worthless when he says yes," she was self confident.

"Regina, let it be," Carmichael warned.

"She's digging her grave," Darcy sighed.

"Why? He's absolutely my type," she made up her mind.

"He's a dangerous man Ms. Harris," Sitwell tried to scare her off.

"I think that's an understatement," Carmichael said while he watched Phil. "He doesn't smile, he doesn't show any kind of emotion and his aura is creepy," and rumors said he was gay but he wouldn't tell her that.

"You're just scared of him," she nagged. "He's perfect."

"and she digs and digs and digs," Darcy rolled her eyes.

"I dig your grave if you don't stop with the crap," she snapped irritated before she returns her attention back to Sitwell.

"Justified," Sitwell mumbled.

"Don't tell me you're scared of him," Harris chuckled.

"Actually, I am," he said stiffly. "But he's not the one I'm most scared of."

She frowned but ignored his statement. "Wish me luck," Harris smiled at Carmichael, he sighed.

"Doc, down to the break room ASAP or you'll miss it again," Darcy had called the shrink.

Robert gave her a questioning look, "the shrink," she explained.

"Why do we need a shrink?"

"Harris might need him and I promised him to call in time," she smiled and used her phone again.

"What did I miss?" Frank breathed heavily.

"Not much," Sitwell answered, "she just followed Coulson out of the break room."

"Come on guys," Hill ordered. "Be silent and don't disturb them and one of you get a cup of coffee, just for cover," she winked.

Robert was confused why everyone sneaked up to Coulson's office.

Harris took a deep breath before she knocked. "Come in," Coulson's tone was neutral.

"Good morning sir," she stood straight and made sure that her boobs showed off.

"What can I do for you agent?" Coulson raised a brow.

"I'm new to the unit and wanted to introduce myself, sir," she smiled sweetly.

"I know who you are," Coulson returned his attention back to the file he had read before, "and your shirt isn't buttoned correctly."

She blushed. "I heard a lot about you sir," she buttoned up her shirt.

"It's all true," he said without interest.

"Don't you want to know what I heard before you confirm it?" she frowned.

Phil looked up. "What did you hear agent," he said dutifully.

"I heard you work with the Avengers and that you're the best."

"That's true," he confirmed, "but that's not the reason you're here."

"No, sir," she smiled. "I want to ask you out on a date sir," she came closer.

Phil leaned back in his chair, gazing at the ceiling. Hawkeye smirked at him. Darcy had warned him that a newbie wanted to steal his husband away.

"I'm not interested," Phil tilted his head to look at her.

"But I'm sure we are the perfect match," she touched his chest seductively.

"I don't think so," Phil pursed his lips. "I'm taken."

"I'm sure she's nothing compared to me. Use the chance to replace her with someone younger," the audience in front of Coulson's office held their breath.

"Don't shoot her. We actually need new agents," Phil spoke out loud. She frowned deeply; there was no one around but Phil and her.

"Spoil sport," she heard a voice from above. "Who?"

"Hawkeye," Phil pointed at his lover. "Agent Harris," he pointed at her.

"Ahh, you're part of the Avengers," she looked him up and down. "I don't understand why SHIELD sends you into the field. You're just an archer."

"Phil?" Clint begged, "Please."

"I said no," Phil said serious. "Ms. Harris, Agent Barton is a top Agent and has a security clearance you'll never reach and I would show him some respect."

"But he just threatened to kill me that's not respectful at all," she almost whined and brushed against Phil's shoulder.

Clint raised his new bow and aimed at her head, Phil had given him his new bow with a silver ring in the middle, just like his gun, as a present before he was cleared for field work. "Clint I said no."

"I tend to ignore orders," Clint seemed dead serious.

"Phil, help me," she tried to sound not scared.

"Agent Coulson, not Phil," Phil winked at Clint.

"But he called you Phil too," she justified.

"That's because we're pretty close," Clint said. "I've got an idea," he beamed. "I train her for a week and take her with me on the next mission, showing her what it means to be a sniper."

"Don't get her killed." Phil scratched his forehead, "I lost enough agents this month."

"What?" she squeaked, "I and the Avengers? No way."

"It's an order agent Harris."

"Phil," a sly smile spread over Clint's face. "Can we start with lesson one?" he put his bow away.

"Do what you want," Phil smirked.

"Oh I just fell in love with you all over again," Clint bounced on his heels.

Her eyes widened. "You …and … you, are?"

"Married? Yes," Phil sounded bored.

"You're kidding," she laughed hysterically.

"Nope, I'm not that old am I?" Clint beamed with joy. "Come on we have to get ready for lesson one."

"Darcy, coffee please," Phil said, Darcy almost stumbled into the room but she wasn't ashamed for listening.

"Dig, dig, dig," Darcy sing-song while she brought the coffee. "How many are there?" Phil's eyes glittered with mischief.

"Fifty-four," she answered, "and I think we will be ca. hundred once lesson one starts."

"You set me up," Harris yelled.

"We warned you but you wouldn't listen," Darcy warned.

"Come over here," Clint ordered with a serious face.

She did as she was told; he looked her up while he pulled out his phone. "Hey Tony I could use back up, just in case…"

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Ten minutes later they stood on the roof of SHIELD HQ.

"246, bystander and a camera. That's a record. Legal department, science department, even the medical and kitchen staff showed up," Darcy informed Coulson. He suppressed a smile and put on his sunglasses to hide the amusement in his eyes.

"Put your arms around my neck," Hawkeye stood in front of her with his bow in his hand.

"Did I miss it?" they heard Fury ask. Hope shimmered in Harris's eyes.

"No sir," Coulson replied.

"Great," he stopped next to Coulson. She paled even more after she realized that he wasn't there to help.

"Put your arms around my neck," Hawkeye ordered again. She shook her head and tried to get away.

Hawkeye sighed deeply and shook his head, "Fledglings," before his face lit up. "Lesson number one: Flying," he grabbed her around the hip and jumped with a smooth motion down the roof.

Her panicked scream was audible from kilometers away.


End file.
